Tag Archives: Despair

Sticky, Stuck

My mind is sticky, stuck,

That’s the tricksy part of luck;

To have these thoughts, these needs,

and to never set them free…

They do not know me yet

– closet hyperbolic wreck –

(See, they still think I’m sane

and I still play their games),

But my mind is sticky, stuck,

My lips are melted shut

while my heart growls, stomach screams,

and an earthquake rips my seams.

Black Dog’s pulling on his lead;

A hungry, rabid fiend,

Must let the right ones in

to this naked sideshow of my sin,

But my mind is sticky, stuck,

Disconnected, out of touch,

And they will see the cracks set in,

Watch through translucent skin,

See my insides turn to ash,

Watch me stutter, jerk, and thrash,

But they’ll never do enough

to get my sticky mind unstuck.

 

 

Two Hundred Miles

It took two hundred miles for my heart to heal
Two hundred miles to forget what I feel

The first mile I held you and wouldn’t let go
To mile forty I refused believe it was so

By mile eighty I hated you and all we had been
I cursed you with loathsome abhorrence extreme

After one hundred miles I begged, “don’t break my heart,
If you just say you love me we can make a fresh start”
Twenty miles more and I was down on my knees
Pained from the strain of my frustrated pleas

It was one hundred and sixty miles when I hit
The most hollow and emptiest bottomless pit
Despair and depression of the most profound kind
Numbness so powerful it captured my mind
I would lay there just staring, no more tears could I shed
For the bitterness consumed me, my soul torn to shreds
One seventy, one eighty, one ninety went by
The worthlessness stayed until one ninety nine

Then two hundred and I managed to catch a quick breath
The air filled my lungs to an incredible depth
The rush was a gust of refreshment untold
I felt the strength grab me, the peace taking hold
And at once I was calm, I was at peace with the fact
You hurt me, you left me, and you aren’t coming back
I am no longer yours, nor are you mine
I accept that it’s over and I’ll be just fine